Six Ways To Keep A Man

Truth is, every guy is different. So you might actually obey all the six rules on this post and he will still leave you for an uglier girl with downs syndrome. Men are confusing and confused. Today they like a girl with big a*s, tomorrow it’s the smaller ones they like. So why am I giving six rules anyway? Because my boss asked me to and I have to get paid. So. Here. We. Go!

1. Luck: yup! That’s right. You saw that correctly. Everyone is talking about Chioma and Davido (can we be done with that already?) People are wondering what she did to make our favourite musician stick to her like glue. Beauty? Juju (Nollywood style)? Good sex? Nada! I think she was just lucky. You need to know what to do to make your man stick. It could be loyalty, it could be pregnancy, it could be good head. In a nutshell, you need luck with us men.

2. Self worth: when your life ambition is to find a good man and date or marry, you will have to take whatever he throws at you. Men love what they can’t have. If you show them you can live and survive happily without them, you stand a better chance of keeping them. But if they know all your hope and aspirations depends on them, my sister, they will use you and play ball.

3. Space: Boys love to hang out with friends, play video games, watch football, etc. It’s not every time they are not with you they are cheating. They could be somewhere arguing with friends about something as stupid as Messi vs Ronaldo. It is stupid to you, but not to them. Allow them. If you gumbody, they will get bored easily.

4. Support them: Many ladies don’t even know what their partner’s passion is. Every guy has a passion and it is a ladies’ duty to discover this and support it. Sometimes it might involve following him to the studio to record that song, or helping him sharpen his pencil so he can draw. We take note of little things like this.

5. Look Good: We are moved with what we see. Whether u like it or not, the first attraction is always physical. You need to keep that physical attraction intact. Wear under wears in his favourite colour, dress like a school girl if that pleases him. There was something he saw in you that made him approach in the first place. Do everything possible to remain that way. If you were slim, try not to get fat!

6. Know his interests: is it football? Buy him his team’s Jersey as a gift. Is it movies? Sometimes get tickets to go see his favourite movie with him. Don’t come and be dragging remote to watch zee world when Man united vs Arsenal is going on.

Bonus: Give him head: Added this just in case my girlfriend is reading this article.

PS: Before you feminists attack me, it is not a girl’s duty alone to keep the relationship. It goes both ways. I am simply writing from the perspective of the guy. Now you can rant in the comments.

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